The Red Flags of a "False" Dom: How to Spot a Fake Online
The Red Flags of a "False" Dom: How to Spot a Fake Online
In the world of online BDSM and kink communities, it's not uncommon to come across individuals who claim to be dominants (doms) but lack the genuine qualities and intentions of a true dominant. These "false" doms can be misleading, manipulative, and even predatory, making it essential for submissives and other community members to be aware of the warning signs.
What is a "False" Dom?
A "false" dom is someone who presents themselves as a dominant online, but lacks the necessary skills, knowledge, and character to fulfill the role in a healthy and respectful manner. They may use dominant language, claim to have certain skills or experiences, or even use manipulative tactics to control or exploit others. However, their actions and behavior often contradict their claims, revealing a lack of genuine dominance and potentially putting others at risk.
Red Flags to Watch Out For
So, how can you spot a "false" dom online? Here are some common red flags to watch out for:
Lack of experience or knowledge: A true dom takes the time to learn about BDSM, kink, and the specific interests and needs of their partners. A "false" dom may claim to be experienced, but lacks the basic understanding of safety protocols, boundaries, and communication.
Inconsistent or contradictory behavior: A "false" dom may say one thing, but do another. They may claim to be interested in a specific type of play, but then pressure or coerce their partner into something else.
Manipulative or coercive language: A "false" dom may use guilt trips, emotional manipulation, or gaslighting to control or influence their partner's decisions. They may also use dominant language to belittle or intimidate others.
Lack of respect for boundaries: A true dom respects and prioritizes their partner's boundaries and consent. A "false" dom may disregard or push boundaries, ignoring their partner's needs and desires.
Overemphasis on control or power: A "false" dom may prioritize control and power over mutual respect, trust, and communication. They may see their partner as a means to an end, rather than a person with their own agency and autonomy.
Inability to take feedback or criticism: A true dom is open to feedback, criticism, and growth. A "false" dom may become defensive, dismissive, or even aggressive when confronted with constructive criticism or concerns.
Lack of transparency or honesty: A "false" dom may hide their true intentions, experiences, or motivations. They may lie about their age, location, or other personal details, or use fake profiles to manipulate others.
Pressure to meet in person or engage in play: A "false" dom may push for in-person meetings or play, even if their partner is hesitant or unsure. They may use tactics like "you're not a real sub if you don't meet me" or "you're just playing games if you don't want to play with me."
Protecting Yourself Online
To avoid falling prey to a "false" dom, it's essential to prioritize your online safety and well-being. Here are some tips:
Take your time: Don't rush into anything, especially if you're new to online BDSM communities. Take the time to get to know someone, and prioritize building trust and communication.
Research and educate yourself: Learn about BDSM, kink, and online safety. Understand the basics of consent, boundaries, and communication.
Be cautious of strangers: Be wary of individuals who approach you out of the blue or seem overly interested in dominating or controlling you.
Trust your instincts: If something feels off or doesn't feel right, trust your instincts and distance yourself from the situation.
Seek out reputable communities: Look for online communities that prioritize safety, consent, and respect. Avoid communities that seem to tolerate or encourage predatory behavior.
Conclusion
Spotting a "false" dom online requires vigilance, education, and a healthy dose of skepticism. By being aware of the red flags and prioritizing your online safety, you can avoid falling prey to manipulative or predatory individuals. Remember, a true dom prioritizes mutual respect, trust, and communication, and is committed to creating a safe and consensual environment for all parties involved.
